A Chatroom Blues

I went into a chat room, for I had some time to spare.
But the mood was dark and ugly, I got the heck outta there.
The emoticons were livid, the font was quite irate
the text was vexed because Barack is not from any state!

The President is a commie, and a Kenyan, that’s a fact
A democrat and a muslim, did you notice that he’s Black?
A community organizer and Chicago gangster all in one
He taxes the rich, his wife’s a witch, and maybe lesbian.

Now, that was just a warm-up, the best was on its way
Did you know that rock and roll is making teens turn gay?
That rappers’ native rhythms enslave our naive daughters
Scientists used hypnosis, so we’d think the globe is hotter

Now, you know I like to argue, and I love a good debate
I want to hear the facts, man, not why or whom you hate
If you swear, use ‘their’ for ‘there’, and climb up on a ‘latter’
if you won’t use commas, period, ‘than’ your opinion doesn’t matter

Those vapor trails behind jet planes are getting out of hand
the feds use ’em for spreadin’ barium across this oppressed land
Though it lacks rhyme or reason, we know it to be true,
just like we knew Saddam had nukes, and Roosevelt was a Jew.

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