PARODIES OF MATCHSTICK MEN

SONG FRAGMENTS

I’m an old cowhand, I-Pad in my hand
I find lost calves with my search engine
I’m a cowboy who knows his way around the web
my start-up went public, and I bought this spread
It didn’t cost me a sixth of the bread
That I got from my IPO

-----------------------
BIGGER FRAGMENTS

They're strugglin' in France and Germany's funds are low
And there's no chance that Italy's premier won't go
When the pound is going down
and no dollars can be found
well, whaddya know?
it's China we owe
 
And it's all because your money's no good
And you gotten rid of your gold
Your nickels are wooden and
the dollars' sunk mighty low
There no use Greecin' palms
and if you're seeking alms , just wherdyago
Not Portugal!
 
Now the Chinese say
 that today they'd rather buy the yen
They claim the USA
was a much better place back then
bankers were more human
And the only worthless bucks were Indian
 
And it's all because
you're off the gold standard
and you spend like a drunk intends
You save your christmas cards 
but your money you think won't ever end
I warned you, friend
--------------------
 
Get your Tercel started
back out of your driveway
Don't go past the Stop sign
Until you've looked both ways
 
Yeah I gotta go earn a living
10 per cent to the IRA
put some in the son's fund for college
Sure hope he keeps up his grades
 
But all that crap's forgotten
when the overpass I'm under
and some jerk slows down and blocks me
He should pay me for that blunder
 
If I wasn't so short and skinny
I'd be right there on his chrome
I'd follow him and then I'd kick him
Make him wish he'd stayed at home
 
I'd thrash him real good
If only I really could
I'd bruise him to the bone
if weighed more
Than nine stone
I've got a mean inner child
Please don't get me riled
 
 
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