TRUMP SELLS SOUL TO SATAN

Popularity Drops 1%
(IP)
In what he calls a ‘major expansion of the brand’, President Donald Trump announced on Friday that he had sold his immortal soul to the Devil.
“He sent me an offer, said the President, “and I have to say it was a beautiful letter, beautifully written. I’ve never seen a more beautiful written offer, that was written in words. It was amazing. And I know a deal when I see it, and this is a deal, the perfect deal.”
” For eight years, Obama tried to sell his soul to Satan. But no deal , Obama can’t close, no deal, poor little Obama.”
” we’ve all done it,” said treasury secretary Mulcahey, ” Get over it.”

The expected outrage on the part of the religious right was muted, to say the least.
“Goodness, you’d think he had done something terrible!” Said long-time Trump supporter, Ida Mae Badadder. ” I know the devil’s done bad things, but who hasn’t? Aren’t we all sinners? Trump is a genius for reaching out!”
“Hillary could never have done a deal like this!” Said sources from both sides of the aisle.
Most Republican leaders were equally sanguine. When asked for a comment, sen. Lindsey Graham (R-sc) replied , “i’ve always liked Satan, never felt otherwise.”
” The president’s personal attorney, Rudy Giuliani, spoke with the Press about the matter.
“He signed in blood, not ink! This is a civil matter and blood evidence is inadmissible in the court of public opinion. Pull my finger, this is cool.”
Speaker Nancy Pelosi issued a statement that read, in part, “…a clear violation of the emolument clause of the Constitution. If, indeed, this is true. Because frankly,” said the usually far less candid speaker, “the Presidents soul doesnt have a gold ribbon pinned to it, to put it mildly. It’s a pig best kept in the poke”.
“Bawa Wawa Nancy Wancy scuzzy Pelosi!” Was the presidents response on twitter the following… (cont. p. 12a)

One response to this post.

  1. Hee hee. https://youtu.be/ckvDo2JHB7o. So much for that outcome.

    Reply

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